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Monday, September 26, 2011


baja rock

A couple of questions I've carried in my head most of the days of my life don't obsess me, but they stay with me. First, if God is love and wants us to be kind and considerate, why does everything living on earth need to kill to live? We can only live eating the living. A bird needs living bugs or living grain. Dog food out of a can is a cow / horse / whatever that's been killed. Lunch meat is a cow that was killed at a stockyard. We humans eat everything, even possum. Everything has to be killed to be eaten, though in Korea a small live octopus is a delicacy to eat alive, though I suppose stomach acids kill it, and no more oxygen. Then there are the people who only eat vegetables because some of them don't want to be a part of the killing cycle. Because God sez. We have God on the one hand telling us not to kill, while setting up a creation where everything has to kill to live. The only way I can make sense of it is to put aside my own thinking and start over.

The other question is why does reproduction go to the young? Young kids, late teens - early twenties, don't know much about children. They're at a time in their lives when their own egos are the primary interest. I remember as a child kids whose parents were older seemed to me happier kids. Or so it seemed from the outside. The answer to the question is, of course, biological is the purpose. Healthy stock. From conversations with Sparta lawyer Donna Shumate, she calls the get married, have babies way of living Biological. She never wanted to live entirely by biology. She wanted to use her mind. She's made for herself a good balance. She lives by her mind as well as biologically. She had 2 kids by intent. She's an intelligent woman with two kids she raises consciously. This doesn't mean nobody else does. Plenty of people do. She's just an example.

Outside what we call civilization, people lived in tribal structures where the whole tribe raised the kids. The tribal system is an awfully good one, seems to me. In the modern world we like our individual status, and a lot of people don't like being too close to others. In a tribal system you have no secrets. Everybody knows what everybody else is doing at all times. The importance of family has transferred from the tribal way to the more individual way of civilization. Small communities seem a fair balance between the two ways of life. I suppose one answer to my question is that variety keeps things going, like the almost infinite varieties of apples in the mountains of Kazakhstan. An apple's pod of seeds has a different kind of apple for each seed. Grafting is the only way to get the same kind of apple from tree to tree. Then you get a monoculture going, weak, susceptible to disease and parasite bugs.

I can't help but think that death is nothing in God's eye. Nothing at all. Like Caterpillar sees me one day wearing brown shirt and green pants, another day wearing tan shirt and blue pants. She watches me sit on the side of the bed and change colors. I sometimes wonder what she thinks of the giant's ability to take off and put on colors. I doubt she's jealous, because she has beautiful cat fur that doesn't need changing. She used to hunt mice day and night, go out in the meadow or into the woods and sit for hours waiting for something to move. She's not sinning because she's killing. She's getting a midday snack, candy bar with the flavor of blood instead of chocolate. I continue to grieve the loss of TarBaby, my friend for 12 years, though I know from God's way of seeing, TarBaby is fine, don't worry, be happy.

Pets have to die. Friends have to die. I believe in every scripture we're told that our relationship with God is with the one friend who does not die. I've heard a lot of people talk about never wanting to die, wishing we could live forever. My solution to that question, is live for 200 years and then decide if you want millions of more years. After 100 you're in a wheelchair if you can get out of bed. 110? 120? 130? They say, "You're so lucky to live so long." LOL Old age is a curse in just about all cases. An old-old saying says the good die young / the blessed die young. There came a time for me about when I entered the 60s that it started getting tiresome keeping this body upright. And for people with complicated lives, kids and grandkids, inlaws, other people expecting of you, other people telling you what to do (for their interest, not yours), and work expectations, so much that it's hard to find oneself in all that mixup. These are the things we take seriously and think of dying as the very most ultimate worst that can ever happen. They say to a guy who lost both legs in a motorcycle wreck, "You're so lucky to be alive." I'm thinking, Heaven is worse than living on earth with no legs?

I don't know anything about the other side, but what the people have told us who know the secrets of life and death, our consciousness continues. I have no idea. But when God says, Don't worry, be happy, I have to give that thought. It can go both ways; be happy, don't worry. Absence of worry is happiness. When you're happy, you don't worry. Worries are the barbed wire fence between unhappy and happy. The closest to an answer I've come to with why creation is set up that we have to kill to live, is simply to keep it going. If death is nothing but maybe a nap between changings of clothes, a gazelle scared into sleep by a lion wakes up a baby giraffe. Why so much death? The only answer I can find is, Get used to it. Death and life are two sides of the same coin that's flipping in the air. The scriptures are God's way of getting the secrets of life and death to us, to help us understand our lives better, but we turn them into rule books, Robert's Rules of Order, God's Rules of You Better Not. Then they become a ball and chain, and the tradition built up around centuries of collective belief in God as Judge has to be broken down so the truth of Don't Worry Be Happy can live again.


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