WILDLIFE BLUES

up in the air jr birdman

I'm a little bit excited today. Got my first shot of a flying crow that was other than a blur. Others got no bird at all. Today I got 2, this one by far the better of them. The other one you have to look for the bird. The crow was standing there, walking around, looking for something to eat, but uneasy about coming any closer to the house with the giant on the porch. They know I'm their friend, but they're rightfully cautious. I don't want them to think because one of the giants is friendly the rest of them are. Crows continue to be target practice for hunters.

I was holding the camera getting pictures of 4 of them standing around watching the giant to see what he was going to do. This crow jumped into the air and I pointed the camera in that direction and pushed the button fast as I could get it done. Now that I have several pictures of crows on the ground, it's time to start trying to catch them in flight. What I want most is when one comes flying to the ground in a dive and fans all the feathers out to come to a quick stop in the air and settle for a smooth landing.

Getting the picture of the flying bird brought to mind seeing in a book called, if I remember correctly, Zen and the Art of Archery, in Zen you get one chance. After snuffing out a candle with an arrow, the height of skill with bow and arrow is a flying bird. Jr Maxwell was able to hit a flying bird with a rifle. He didn't even have to tell me. I already knew he could, just from knowing him. His thinking on that subject is the old way, and mine is the post-television way. He shoots them. I feed them.

We don't argue about it. It's a big deal to me, but only for me. It's my own principle for myself and nobody else. I can't stop the fading away of the birds. The way things are looking, esp in the mountains where Christmas tree patches are everywhere, we won't have birds after 5 more years. All our wildlife is being poisoned out. But, you see, that's a good thing. When the economy gets better, the realtors will transfer more and more land to city people from the suburbs. They don't like things like wildlife. Racoons tear up trash bags. Snakes are scary. Skunks smell bad. Possums are ugly. Birds are pretty at the feeder, but they also shit on our cars. Deer bang up our cars. Bears are really scary.

When we're rid of the wildlife, the mountains will be just right for the suburbanites coming in. No more problem of a deer jumping out in front of you and the airbag going off in your face. No more roadkill skunks to stink up the highway. No more possums with their guts strewn about on the road. No more bats. Bats are creepy. No more rabbits running under your tire making you feel guilty. Aw, Peter Rabbit. No more tree frogs to make those shrill noises so you have to turn the tv up at night. Of course, with windows closed and AC on, they're not an issue.

No more mice in your walls. No more exterminator bills. It gets better all the time. Spiders. They gotta go. They're really ugly. And one or two out of a million are poisonous and make a sore. Wasps and hornets. Outta here. We don't want em. It will be safe to walk from your car door to the house without seeing anything scary in the driveway, like a blacksnake. Yikes. But a garage connected to the house is best. Then you don't have to be out in the nasty old world at all. Who listens to birds sing anyway? When we have Mary J Blige and Prince.

Back in the time of the Ayatollah, Tom Pruitt's brother Millard said to me while we were watching Muslims pray on the news in one of their 3 second videos, "We oughta A-bomb em." I said, "Then you'll have to A-bomb the next one, then another one. When you've got everybody A-bombed that doesn't agree with you, you're all that's left." He said, "That'd be all right."